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Hansel & Gretel
Written by Adam G Smith
Step into the enchanting world of Hansel & Gretel, a modern reimagining of the classic fairy tale. Packed with daring adventures, hilarious comedy, and a rich variety of characters, this pantomime offers something for every performer to sink their teeth into. The story unfolds as the mischievous twins, Hansel and Gretel, are lured into the dark forest by the wicked Witch Madam Hogweed and her cunning cat, Salazar. When their disappearance comes to light, their determined mother, Mrs. Dusterbrump, rallies an unlikely rescue team: her lovable lodger Silly Billy, the bumbling Sheriff Hard-Up, and the warm-hearted schoolteacher, Lena.
On their journey, they encounter the flamboyant Prince Fabulous and his hapless sidekick, Fritz. With a little help from the enchanting Fairy Foxglove, they uncover a sinister truth: the twins haven’t simply wandered off—they’ve been taken!
This pantomime offers a unique twist for those seeking something beyond the traditional tales. With its lively humour, heart-warming moments, and a sprinkle of magic, Hansel & Gretel promises to deliver a sweet treat your audience will love!
Running Time - 1 Hour 40 Mins
Cast Size 12
Cast
Hansel – A mischievous young boy.
Gretel – A clever young girl who often gets led astray by Hansel.
Mrs Dusterbrump – Flamboyant Dame Character and mother of Hansel & Gretel.
Silly Billy – Comedy Role, helps at Mrs Dusterbrump’s Launderette.
Lena – Young school teacher of the Village, falls in love with Prince Fabulous.
Prince Fabulous – An exceedingly narcissistic Prince who despite this flaw, has a kind heart.
Frtiz – The Prince’s loyal stooge.
Fairy Foxglove – A magical Fairy who looks out for Hansel & Gretel.
Madam Hogweed – An evil & cunning witch who wants to eat as many children as possible.
Salazar – A Black Cat and Madam Hogweed’s right hand man (well cat) .
Sherriff Hardup – Local lawman who has taken a fancy to Mrs Dusterbrump.
Mr Piftzr/ Tim Cauldron - Ensemble Characters.
Script
Sample
Prince F: Look Fritz, its a beautiful lady.
Fritz: (looking out the audience) – you’re clearly not looking at the same people as me then.
Prince F : No, look over there.
Lena: Oh, hello there!
Prince F: Fritz! Introduce me to this wonderful girl.
Fritz: (clearing throat and unravelling scroll) Miss allow me to introduce his most splendo…
Prince F: Its ok Fritz, actually allow me. Well, hello there beautiful, the name is Prince, Prince Fabulous (Strikes a smouldering pose)
Lena: Erm, Is he ok?
Fritz: Oh yea sometimes he gets stuck in his smouldering state (hits Prince Fabulous) Oi!
Prince F: Oh, sorry about that. I have to say you look as wonderful as your singing sounded, I love this shabby sheek look and you really own the whole dirt underneath the fingernail’s thing.
Lena: Oh my, sorry your highness but I have been out collecting flowers for the classroom.
Prince F: Classroom? (turns to Fritz) I know the common folk are not very well educated but surely they shouldn’t still be in school at this age?
Lena: Excuse me. I am a teacher.
Prince F: A Teacher? But you can’t be your…well they are normally…well not like this (gesturing at Lena)
Lena: Your majesty I find that rather sexist, us women can make just as good teachers as the men can.
Prince F: No I don’t mean that, I mean that you are surely too good looking to be a teacher. It is well known that all teachers are old and ugly.
Lena: Oh right, well thank you I guess. Anyway what is a prince like you doing out here such a long way from your castle?
Fritz: His majesty is out hunting.
Lena: Hunting? My word how exciting, are you hunting bear?
Prince F: No, I always keep my tights on.